Reflections

As Ramadaan nears it's end, one can only reflect on the month .... but I had a few other reflections too .....

I read a few of my older posts, and the first thing that struck me was that it's still cold ! Last November I complained about no summer. I've been feeling that it's been a bit long that I've layered my clothing and I am not mistaken ! I think I need to move closer to the equator. Electricity restrictions doesn't go well with cold weather !

Secondly, DD has changed !! She is no longer a helpful little person in my life. DS still messes when he eats, but now he cleans too! Perhaps being helpful is a phase they go through.

Thirdly, I still can't keep a hand on a tidy house! I have a lady cleaning twice a week and a dishwasher. The level seems unchanged whether DD is home or not. All I can deduce is that DH's absence is giving me more, so I think it is time to delegate .....

Finally Ramadaan reflections..... all I can say is Algamdulillah that my heart aches that it is coming to an end.

Eid Mubarak everyone !

What's new ?!

So here's my "later" post.
DD was home and I didn't know what I was supposed to do with her!
It was all so sudden and feeling like DH dumped her education on me.
Algamdulillah a few good friends guided me and I did NOTHING ! I decided to slow things down. It was getting out of hand with her EXPECTING me to occupy her ALL day and the kind of things that DS couldn't partake in so that caused major upheaval.
But she wanted to be kept busy - so following Home schooling resources we created a lap book . How fantastic ! It's like scrap booking meets school projects ! Our theme was Ramadaan and I tried to keep it low key for her level. (Yes, I could take pictures and post them to show you, but I have a workshop and outreach iftaar tonite and have fruit platters to prepare after the workshop so I'm not going to.)
So the basics of what we covered for this lap book

• Ramadaan is the 9th month of the Islamic calendar
• phases of the moon
• do's and don'ts in Ramadaan
• Cave of Hira and revelation of Surah
• Laylatul Qadr
• Ramadaan Quizz
  
• Ramadaan Duas
• Eid maze
• Information about Eid

A few of these were found online at other blogs.

But as you have read in the other post I was so busy keeping her busy I didn't get time for me.
So I took charge - I really shouldn't - I should leave things for DH, but he's not efficient... or at least not efficient enough for me !
So I called up this Hifz school that a dear friend has been telling me about and I really liked the sales pitch. ( I say that as many people can sell a product, it's only once you use it do you agree or not. ) It's a big decision as the commitment comes from more than just the child. I prayed and prayed but didn't seem content. I then arranged to meet with another school. unfortunately I couldn't make the meeting and DH went. I arranged to meet at the school later that week so as I get more of a clue and I LOVED it ! I love the idea of learner centered and going at your own pace. But how would this all tie together ?
After more praying and more duahs it clicked. DD is 5 and "technically" only needs to be registered at school in 2011 when she is 7. That gives us a year's grace.
Insha'Alalh the plan is for her to attend the Hifz school. I am hoping to do a teaching program with HLL school and home school her during her hifz period. And then we'll take it from there.
So why is she at school now ?
The Hifz school requires her to do a 2 week assessment and once we decided on this plan we let her start immediately. And she LOVES it !
Algamdulillah

15th of Ramadaan

I can't believe it's half way already ! :-(
I decided to be different this year. Not set goals I couldn't achieve and beat myself up. It's been a tough few months and the past few weeks had more than enough change to throw me out of sync with schedules. I like my ducks in a row, but every now and then they can change direction.
For some or other reason I just couldn't find my Ramadaan groove. Having DD at home was great, I did alot with her - she did a wonderful Ramadaan lapbook (more on that next time). Having the 2 kids and the usual busy house schedule with DH coming home 10 minutes before iftar has been a challenge and tiring. Initially I tried doing taraweeg and tahajud and witr - but I felt exhausted. And would crash after Thur salaah. DD started school (more on that later ;-) ) and I thought freeing me up would help, but still not. This is my off time, and funny how it is, when you can't do something you want it more....
THAT's my groove - I usually have a 2 day break, but this month I'm onto 5 ! I MISS salaah, I WANT to read Quran, and I want to spend my time doing THAT. As disappointed as I felt that it's 5 days, I realise Allah's Wisdom in answering my duah to get the Ramadaan feeling. I have been going through the motions with loads of things - the kids, the house, ibaadah. And having the extended, unexpected break, jolted me and made me grateful. Insha'Allah now that I have realised the lesson - I can get back to partaking in the joys of the month!
If anyone else has been feeling off track - take advantage while you can.
I pray that I live to see another Ramadaan, so that I may continue to enjoy it's blessings.

Life lessons and big decisions

What a week ! I am so emotionally drained today! Well, I DID cry quite a bit. Some days it's not easy being a parent.
Let me take you through the long process that led me here.
Algamdulillah we decided we wanted DD to study the Quran full time. Though a simple enough decision, we had a few things to decide mainly WHEN. After chatting to NUMEROUS people this was our conclusion : she starts next year and includes academic studies. There aren't many places that offer it. Dh spoke to a few sheikhs and concluded that I do the academic syllabus and get a tutor for the Quran lessons. Everything was gong well. (Remember my post about BIG changes in our family ? ) She'd complete the rest of the year and I'd get a curriculum and find a tutor etc.
And then .... then the darn swine came ! H1N1 hit the school and we decided to keep her home. Personally I think DH enjoyed not having to travel to the school in the morning and battle with traffic back to work, and announced that we should keep her at home and start the program now. I was unsettled. I wasn't ready and felt confused. I don't like sudden changes that change almost everything! It has been an odd 10 days, one day I want her back at school and he doesn't, then he says ok she goes back and then I realise his point and decide to keep her. In all of this SHE was very confused! And THAT was the worst feeling for me ! She missed her classmates and even though she wanted this, she didn't know how to get both.
When making this decision, I thought the hardest thing I'd have to face is our parents, but after dealing with my, DD, and Dh's emotions, dealing with my dad was easy!
By this morning I was still unsure. Yes we had decided to keep her home and there seemed to be hurdles in the path - like with any decision. We decided to contact the school - Aasiyah had a few things there and wanted to collect them. I think I was more emotional than her. We chatted to the teachers and a few of her classmates, but she was great. She seemed to have found her contentment with the decision Algamdulillah.
Someone commented recently : what can we learn from children ? We can learn about LIFE in it's purest form!
May Allah guide us on this path. May our intentions stay pure and solely to win His pleasure. Aameen.

Some more advertising

OK, so I know I said I probably won't be blogging before Ramadaan, but things change. Like the outbreak of H1N1 at DD's school. If that was a test of faith, I failed - I very quickly opted to keep her home rather. Having a healthy kid at home for a few days is better than a sick kid for 2 weeks!
But that's another story - my house cleaning saga continues!
I thought I had settled on good enough, but I suppose after a few weeks of the same dust bunnies hoping around my house, I got fed up. So I got rid of yet another domestic worker. I decided to commit to an agency - yes it's more pricey, but definitely value for money!
Nadia, has her own agency called The Dream Team. If you want her number you'll have to mail me. Today was the second time I had one of her cleaners at my house, my home is "show house" quality clean!
Now let me give you an idea of all previous workers. On day one at my house they complete ALL tasks around 5pm. After a few weeks they slowly drop to 3pm and then 2pm. I'm a get-done-and-leave kinda employer. The Dream team, worked from 8:15 to 12:15 just in the bedrooms ! She left at 6pm and that didn't include ironing! She was THAT thorough! She is the FLYLADY!! She did everything that I would spread out over weeks - like wiping down walls, and dusting door frames!
Basically, even at this rate, if she slacked, it would still be an outstanding clean!
Algamdulillah

More Nostalgia

We spent the weekend at Leopard Trail. It's a farm just outside Bonnievale, near Robertson. A little more than 2 hours outside of Cape Town. We stayed in a 6 bedroom house and it was HUGE! After getting lost and confused, I eventually drew a map to get my head around what was going on. The house was built in the 1930's around the same time as my home, so there were many similarities with regards to the old feel of the house. The difference being that THIS house, had the furniture too! The kitchen , which is generally the heart of the home, was the most nostalgic for us. The old style kitchen table and chairs - fake wood look with metal structure. We competed in whose granny had that set in their house! The classic wooden display cabinet with sliding glass - very cottage style. And of course all wood has been painted! But this picture/photo of vegetables was the draw card for us - we stood staring at it as if it was a Rembrandt ! It looked familiar, but I couldn't place where I had seen it. But not just seen it - knew it, grew up with it. It was part of my history. Undecided whether it was my granny's place or auntie or a local corner shop, after further discussion, it seems EVERYONE had a relative with that picture up in their house! So it might just be that.
So we are at this farm, and they have farm animals and fruit trees. Fruit being one of their main produce, as well as milk. So on arrival we received a jug of FRESH cow milk! We were all a bit hesitant at first. The idea seemed as odd as drinking milk from a cat! Eventually I gave in and decided to take a gulp (with my nose closed and trying not to focus on the cream layer on top or fat content) - what a moment! It was like a taste bud flash back ! THIS is what milk tastes like ! I know this taste! My fat free version is but cream/white water in comparison. I indulged the first day int his gift of Allah, surely something so tasty could not be harmful. But after a mug full the next morning, guilt and fake heart pains made me "versak". I look forward to the days when I can indulge in the rivers of milk and honey.
We did our trip to town and found the dairy factory shop so got our stock of cheeeeeeeese, milk (fat free) and ice cream. A quick detour to a farmers market then back to the farm in time to see the cows being milked. The kids LOVED it! I think the best part was seeing calves. They are gorgeous! DS was fascinated by everything; tongues, licking, cows, milk. And he smelled like it too!
We haven't been 4x4ing a while, so we had to squeeze it in for old times sake. The route was basic. A few slopes here and there, but nothing a Toyota can't handle. Had the path been wet or the river full, it might have been more interesting. But all in all I think we have out grown "because we can" and are more at "to get where we need to go". To me doing rough routes is simply the way to explore what we need to.
3 dams on the farm, made for a fun afternoon for the kids. There were boats, canoes and mud - so I think it catered for all ages ;-)

So what's my review? I'd make this a permanent holiday house !
The size was perfect for all of us and there was plenty to entertain the kids.
The campsite didn't look too bad. The shower works with a donkey, and I've never been a fan of that. But the shade, dams and lapa could make it a great spot if not crowded.

(I wanted to post a few pics but I changed my operating system and having issues with uploading. Sorry)

Mosaics and 3D pictures

Do you recall a few years ago (ok, maybe more than a few, perhaps more than 10 years ago), Cardies and Get Graphic sold these 3D pictures. You had to stare at them and relax your eyes before you saw the picture.

Do you know those moments in your life where everything seems like an odd piece of a puzzle that doesn't fit and then a little while (or alot depending on the number of pieces in your puzzle) you stand back and you see the picture that the pieces made, like a mosaic.

Tonight, in the still and quiet of the night I had such a moment. A moment of mental peace, which allowed me to relax my eyes, to stand back and view the picture.

The past few months have felt odd, like disjointed bits of a 3D puzzle! I felt completely out of sorts with my life. But the gale wind that blew my life upside down, was not without purpose. Sometimes it needs to be that strong, to fight against my stubborn nature, or to guide to a new, better path, or to take us off the course we are heading. Either way, when it blows, just relax your eyes and let go. Let it take you where you need to go. I stumbled across a few rocks for support, some where used just to get my balance, others were like ropes guiding me, supporting me when I needed it Algamdulillah. But ultimately it's to prepare me for a new path. Insha'Allah a better path.